Things I learned about God from Livvy

Things I learned about God from Livvy Lou | By Bethany Luchetta

I sat outside eating Brunch last week in Newport Beach with a longtime friend from Sydney who happened to be in town doing some music stuff. We don’t get together too often anymore, but it always picks up where we left off; like not much time has passed. You may have those friendships too. They are not without work, and there are historic up’s and down’s; but they last over time. Needless to say, after almost 20 years of friendship, there is more shared history, than unshared history. We talked about churches in the OC. I mentioned walking into a new satellite location in OC of a popular LA church, and immediately feeling old. He chuckled and said, “Thank you. right!? I get that.” I TOTALLY did not expect that response from him, I put him in the ‘young and cool’ category – opposite the table from my aging and ‘not-so-cool’ category. He isn’t even that much younger than me. He’s a music producer, and I’m pretty much a ‘stay at home’ mom now (not to dig on stay-at-home-moms, but let’s face it, we aren’t living the music producer life).  He said he has had this shared experience, as he looks around to comment on his experience, ‘we are the parents?!’. I was 17 when my mom was my age, so that really hits home. We got to reminisce of things we are now learning, but learning from our own offspring instead of our parents or school.

I came home and reflected on the lessons I have been learning about God from my very own Livvy Lou. Here they are for you to ponder, if you haven’t already gleaned these from your own little bambinos.

  1. Running Ahead Before Listening

I am not talking about literally running, although this could be practical for some moms with rambunctious ones. Livvy is a lot like me, and she thinks she knows everything. So, why take the time to sit, acquire and listen, when we can jump into it BECAUSE we already know. It hit me the other day when I said it out loud. Since I am a word person, typically I notice things when they are said verbally; it just resonates with me. I was trying to help Livvy put things into groups in order to count, and then recognize the groups without having to recount again. But, she already knew! Of course, she knows everything, she’s 4. How could I forget. No lessons, self-taught! Then I said out loud, “Livvy, you can’t run ahead before you stop and listen so you know what to do next!” — And there’s the ah-ha moment as I hear God say “Yes, Bethany, please don’t run out ahead, thinking you already know, without stopping to listen for my voice of direction.” Conviction. I have to literally stop talking while I am trying to teach her, and say, “Livvy Lou, mommy struggles with this too. And we both need to work on this. Why don’t we try and work on this together?” Since she is so inquisitive I had to give specific examples, which I did, and helped her understand how this can be a life lesson she works on. That also gave me more grace for her.

  1. Wanting Things Instead of Time

Things are not bad. We all need things. Some people even express their love language with gifts. I get that. And ‘having’ is not bad. I believe it’s when our focus becomes the things, we get off balance. Livvy loves things. Anything from a tube a chapstick to an expensive Ipad. She doesn’t understand the value of money, so those are the same to her. Small gifts are better for her, she feels love and I can give them more often; win-win. But, like most humans, we can get distracted with the things we want. Livvy starts to ask for more, and more, and more. This mommy gets really annoyed because I get stumped between spoiling, meeting her love language and her being naïve on the cost of things. So, I said to her (aloud of course, as to hear God speak through my own mouth to myself), “Livvy, honey, can you please just be okay sitting with me, talking to me, snuggling me. Why do you always ask for things? That’s not how our relationship will grow.” BAM! OUCH… Yes, God. I heard you. I stop and look little Lou Lou in the eyes and say, “You know honey, ‘things’ aren’t bad. I want to give you things. But I also want to just be WITH you. I have a hard time with this too. Let’s both work on it more.” You may think, what an odd way to talk to a 4-year old. Well, I was never a lady to use baby talk, she’s human, I speak to her normally. And trust me, she gets it.

There are several more, but I will leave you with this last one.

  1. Forgetting What Was Just Said

Yep, if you have kids, you know exactly what I am saying. Be it, they were distracted by their sibling, a show, or a toy… they forget what you said in 2 seconds. Parenting is a long exhortation of constant reminding. Let’s hope they outgrow it – at least a little. But, look at the Israelites. Look at ANYONE. We set our mind to something, and bang, we are distracted. Yes, there are exceptions to this rule. There are always exceptions. But the moment I said, “Livvy, when are you going stop getting distracted and forgetting what I just said?!” – Again, I hear God audibly (in my own voice, yet again) – “Hmmm… Yes Dear, when will you?!” He’s so gentle and sweet. I almost cried on this one. Livvy looked at me, and slowed down as if she had disappointed me. She said, “Mamma, what are your feelings?” – because it looked like I was going to cry. I answered the same as before, we both need to work on this one. I am going to practice compassion on you, and you can practice it on me too. But we will both keep working on following and staying on course.

Maybe you have learned something AWEsome like this too. Share it below in the comments for us all to read!


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Bethany Luchetta is a writer of life and reality. In hopes to connect with the humanity around her, she writes from her heart. Bethany just celebrated 7 years of marriage with her love, Vince Luchetta. They are both on their second marriage. Life has not been without challenge in their personal lives and career lives, yet they strive for growth in love and tragedy. They share three beautiful daughters, Makayla (18), Paige (14), and Livvy Lou (4). If you see them, reach out and say hi!

Summer Lovin’

Summer Lovin’ | By Bethany Sousa
Creatively speaking, I always-seem-to-never be able to focus during the summer. I’m always distracted. When I think about summer, I immediately picture being at the beach with my siblings, parents, and sometimes friends, sitting on boogie boards with salty hair, sandy feet, eating a tuna fish sandwich and sipping on capri-sun. I can remember as if it were yesterday. There was such a freedom in summer vacation as an adolescent. Those precious few months of pure bliss of having no expectations from a day-to-day routine of mundane class-work and constant battles of friends being mean and being embarrassed by my unique and different qualities. Oh how I loved those summer days of letting my cares be as free as my hair was while jumping on the trampoline and riding our bikes around the neighborhood. As I got older, more responsibilities piled up which made summer vacation more of a mindset and less of a gift. 
Do you remember when you realized you no longer had “summer vacation”? I was fresh out of high school and taking classes at a community college, working full time at a restaurant, interning, and trying to keep friendships. I remember thinking, “I will never have a free summer vacation ever again”. It was the first taste of a little dish called ‘adulting’, and I was forever changed. I realized I had to work if I wanted to have that ‘first kind’ of summer ever again. Summer went from being a euphoric freedom to being just a season of the year where it was very hot and I had to work a lot because my job was always understaffed and, well, it’s tourist season. However, once I realized that summer could be a state of mind, I noticed a maturing in my heart working itself out.
Summer was becoming about self-love, taking the time to rest, allowing my hair to fly like it would as a kid. Instead of being stuck in the past of summer being about rest and adventure and being mad about having to work, I noticed I had a choice to be able to see this season in an old way again. 
Each year I forget about this summer mindset of liberation. I will get caught up in focusing on so many details of my life and what is happening around me to schedule and keep up with, that I forget to love myself. I always admired watching mom’s in the summer-time.
How you keep your kiddos entertained 24/7, I don’t think I’ll ever understand! You’re epic goddesses! As I watch my family members and friends battle balancing mommy hood with activities, and scheduling playdates, and dinners, all while working being daughters, wives, sisters, friends, etc. How in the world do you ever find time for your summer love?!
Talking with a few close friends who seem to “look like they have it all together”, I realized they don’t! They just never NEVER give up on what brings them joy. One friend is an artist, she teaches it thats how much she loves it! Mommy of two kiddos under the age of three, a kick-booty-wife and friend. And not to down play her incredible heart for praying and taking care of her family, I constantly think to myself “I could never do what she does… I’d loose my mind!”. However, she has taught me over and over again that she finds her balance in never forgetting what she loves to do. Gardening, cooking a new recipe, painting for her friends, going to new coffee shops, simply being spontaneous. Does it look different now in her late 20’s? ABSOLUTELY!
Why should life growth and changes keep her from having that trampoline hair, or even a tunafish sandwich on the beach, moment? It shouldn’t! Self-love is such a gorgeous and delicate vase that we have. Keeping fresh, vibrant flowers in it is a hard task to achieve with all the chaos, yes. But just pause to imagine what life would be like if we could take the same time it takes us to fold a load of laundry, that never seems to end, and do something for ourselves every couple days! Oh, what peace we would find. God has given us unique and fantastic skills and passions. Imagine if we took time to invest in those skills and passions. Maybe a Jesus moment is waiting to be found! Rest is a gift we need to learn to receive from ourselves, lets help each other find it. Lord knows we need it 😉

 


IMG_3304BETHANY is a singer/songwriter currently living in Nashville, TN. Her dream and desire is to partner with other artists collaboratively to help bring awareness to the audience an awakening of purpose. In today’s western culture, we have focused too music on selfish ego and not enough on the bigger picture–we’re all here for a purpose, and we all play an important role in achieving that goal in each other  Art is such an intense expression and tool to use to help awaken peoples minds and souls of their own existence. Music heals us mentally and spiritually, and one of her main goals is to help bring that healing, one song at a time.